101 Questions You Should Be Able to Answer About Your Character
(Must be in OC's POV)
Otherwise entitled: Interview with an Extremely Grouchy Vampire
1. What is your full name? Do you have a nickname?
Daniel Robert Carfax Leland. There is only one person whom I permit to call me Danny. To everyone else, Doctor Leland will do.
2. How old are you? When is your birthday?
Fogey. I was born on the sixth of May, anno Domini eighteen-hundred twenty-eight.
3. Where were you born? Where do you live now? Are you patriotic?
I was born in a small town near Inverness, Scotland, about four hours away by cart. I have resided also in England, France, Nepal, Cambodia, Morocco, Panama, and multiple locations within the United States of America. I have recently returned to the ancestral home, my uncle's place, which I acquired some years ago and have retained pseudonymously through the kind indulgence of Her Majesty.
4. Who are/were your parents? (Names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
My father's name was James, and my mother was Agatha. He was gentry, the younger son of a Lord, and she was the daughter of a Gypsy fishmonger. Needless to say, family reunions were always interesting.
5. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
I was - or am - the eldest of seven children. Collin, Matthew, Edgar, Walter, Jesse, and Rhona. They were odd, but very close.
6. What is your occupation?
It depends upon the global economy, really. I have been a physician, a typesetter, a private secretary, a librarian, a professor, a telegraph operator, a dance hall pianist, and an agent of several of the assorted Majesties of this century and of the previous.
7. How tall are you? How much do you weigh?
Rather personal questions, these. I am six feet, five inches tall and weigh somewhat less than is appropriate for my mass. Odd property of vampirism.
8. What color is your hair? What color are your eyes?
Grey. To both questions.
9. What is your race?
This has already been asked, has it not?
10. To which social class do you belong?
I wouldn't have the faintest idea how to answer that. Such things as class begin to lose meaning after a century or so.
11. Do you consider yourself to be attractive? Do others?
Attractive? Yes. Good-looking? No. Odd, that, isn't it?
At any rate, I seem to attract the mentally unbalanced in hordes. I make a point of avoiding my own kind, as a general rule, but I really am curious as to whether terribly awkward propositions of a suicidal nature are commonplace for vampires. Honestly, I've had more women ask me for death than for dates, and that's really sort of depressing. On the other hand, none of those in the latter category were remotely interesting or intelligent, and murdering them probably would have been a tremendous service to the human gene pool.
12. What is your style of dress?
Drab. Professorial, I suppose. I am still uncomfortable with presenting myself in my shirtsleeves, so one will nearly always find me in jacket and waistcoat. I am partial to jerseys.
13. Do you have any scars? Tattoos? Birthmarks? Other unique physical features?
I was shot once, in my youth. The wound was shallow, but it did leave a mark – a nearly straight line of raised tissue across my back, beneath the right scapula.
14. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
Good gracious, the list goes on! I'm very much allergic to tree nuts, citrus, garlic, cats, pollen of any sort, and latex. I'm atrociously myopic and require visual correction. I'm also arthritic.
15. Are you right- or left-handed?
Right, though I can make do with the left. (There's a story behind that, which I shall not here tell.)
16. What does your voice sound like?
Apparently, hard for Americans to understand. Or "like Mel Gibson." I assume that refers to his role as William Wallace, though the accent he affected for that film was deeply amusing.
17. What kind of vocabulary do you use?
A much broader vocabulary than seems currently to be in use. People really have forgotten how to communicate.
18. List three quirks or other defining characteristics.
Er... I'm astoundingly obsessive-compulsive. I smoke like a chimney. And I'm Catholic.
19. How often do you bathe? Do you wear perfumes?
Impertinence! I try to bathe daily, for your information. And I'm allergic to most perfumes.
I warn you, though: many more questions like this, and I shall stop answering altogether.
20. What kind of facial expression do you commonly wear (dour glare, wry smile, etc)?
I don't think I make expressions, actually. I'm fairly certain I smile. Sometimes.
21. Do you use body language? How?
Only when excited, and then it's usually gesticulating at a slate board.
22. Do you have a commonly used saying?
Not really, no.
23. What is your earliest memory?
I'm not sure. I think it may have been attending a dance at my uncle's home. I was too young to join in the festivities, but I watched through a keyhole. I remember thinking that dancing looked like too much trouble to be much fun.
24. How much schooling have you had? Did you enjoy it?
I schooled at Rugby and then went on to Oxford and medical school. I enjoyed it very much.
25. Where did you learn most of your knowledge and skill?
Study, of course. I admit that only a small portion of my knowledge came from school, but then, I have had a very long time to study since.
26. How would you describe your childhood in general?
I look back on my childhood with nothing but fondness. A house full of siblings and cousins was rarely dull, though I did occasionally wish for a bit more privacy.
27. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I seem to recall having planned to join the priesthood, at one point, but from the time I was ten, I knew I wanted to be a doctor.
28. When and with whom was your first kiss?
Good Lord. In all honesty, it was with my cousin Clara, when I was fifteen, and only because I was dared to do it. If I recall correctly, she wasted no time in rinsing her mouth with brandy.
29. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
I choose not to answer this question.
30. Do you have a notorious or celebrated ancestor? Does that affect you?
My Gran used to say that the family was related to the emperor Constantine, but everyone knew that she was mad and discounted the claim.
31. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
My death, I suppose.
32. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
I have done much, but achieved very little in my life. Perhaps the adoption of my children - long dead now, both of them - counts. I believe that I did well by them, though I lost both Jonah's life and Marion's love before the end.
33. What is your greatest regret?
Regret? I have too many to list. That I am damned; that I could save neither my sister nor my fiancee; that I never once told my mother that I loved her...
34. What is the most embarrassing or shameful thing ever to happen to you?
Another question I would rather not answer.
35. Do you have any secrets? If so, what are they?
Everyone has secrets. One of mine, at least, should be obvious.
36. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
Murder, rape, sacrilege... Take your pick.
37. When was the time you were the most frightened?
When I woke on the third day, not as dead as I had expected to be. When I began to understand what it meant.
38. Have you ever traveled outside of your country? If so, to where?
I have, at one time or another, been in every country in Europe, most in Asia, a few in Africa, and I took a few trips through the Americas.
39. What is your alignment?
Tory. I always vote Tory.
40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
I'm a realist. I've heard it said that realists are nothing but deluded pessimists, but experience has taught me that optimism is foolish. I prefer being pleasantly surprised to being constantly disappointed.
41. Do you believe in a god? If so, which one and why?
There is but one God, and his name is Yahweh. I believe that His begotten Son is Christ Jesus, and that from them proceeds the Spirit. I have little choice but to believe, when their power burns me so.
42. Do you believe in an afterlife?
I do, but not for one such as myself.
43. What is your greatest fear?
Very little truly frightens me anymore. I am uncomfortable at the thought of true death, knowing that I am bound for hell.
44. What makes you angry? Sad? Happy? Why?
Willful idiocy makes me angry. Simple observation takes very little energy, simple deduction even less. Betrayal makes me angry. One might think that, after all this time, I would have learned not to trust. I make myself angry.
I become sad when a friend passes on without me, and they all do.
Every so often, I meet someone who makes me happy. Some of them die, and some of them betray me, and some of them are bright enough to know the truth of me and leave for their own good. It rarely lasts long.
45. Do you think people are basically good or basically evil?
Human beings were created to be good, but are stained by original sin. Therefore, the potential for good or evil lies within every individual. It is a choice that each must make.
46. What are your views on politics?
Again, Tory. I tend toward conservatism.
47. What are your views on gambling, lying, theft, and killing?
I do not personally gamble. I believe it is a vice which easily can consume a person's life.
I do not lie, unless the truth could hurt someone.
I do not steal, as theft is the crime of a coward and a sneak.
To the last... I do not kill when I am able to stop myself.
48. How far will you go to defend your beliefs?
I suppose that depends upon which beliefs I am meant to be defending. Would I die to make someone else believe as I do? No.
49. How much do you value money?
Money is convenient, but hardly essential. It is hard to flee a country, though, when one is flat broke.
50. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
To betray a friend.
51. Do you believe in self-sacrifice for the greater good?
Yes, if for no other reason than because it is logical.
52. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
I did once. Now I am not so sure.
53. Are you superstitious?
I believe in those superstitions I know to be true, if that makes any sense.
54. How much do you respect the beliefs and opinions of others?
As long as they do not believe that they have the right to force their beliefs on me or on others, I respect them.
55. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings?
I am honest about my thoughts. I suppose I conceal my emotions, though I do not lie about them.
56. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
Everyone does, to an extent. I know I still have a hard time taking feminists seriously.
DEALING WITH OTHERS
57. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
The most important? That's complicated.
58. Who is the person you respect the most? Despise the most? Why?
I have never met anyone whom I respected more than Clarence Frazier, a truly remarkable man. I have never despised anyone more than I despise my dame, for reasons which should be obvious.
59. Do you have a significant other? Who? Why?
No. Just... no.
60. Do you have a lot of friends? Who is your best friend?
I have a few associates. Acquaintances. I suppose Aaron Margolis would be my best friend, if anyone is.
61. How do you relate to members of the same race? Class? Sex?
Members of my race tend to be despicable sadistic creatures. I don't relate to them at all, when it can be avoided. I have no idea what class I am in, or whether I am simply an outcaste, so I cannot answer that. I prefer the company of other men, but for some reason, I always seem to be thrown in with women...
62. How do you relate to members of a different race? Class? Sex?
It depends on the race. The afreet is amusing, though childish. The fae rather grate on my nerves after a while. The loups-garous and other versipelles are a bit too rowdy for my tastes. Humans run the gamut.
63. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.
Yes, I have. Augusta. She was a daughter of the regiment, her father a colonel freshly returned from India. She was not yet of age when we met, and I was nearly fifty; it was a bizarrely uneven match, even for that era. She died. I killed her.
64. What do you look for in a potential lover?
This question assumes that I am looking for potential lovers. I am not.
65. How close are you to your family?
The one who remains... I stay as far away as possible.
66. Do you want a marriage, family, and/or children?
I did once. I always thought I had done plenty of child-rearing as a young man, caring for my siblings, and I hoped to keep out of that nonsense for the rest of my life. Augusta wanted children, though. It's odd how so little a nudge can change the firmest of resolutions.
67. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
I avoid conflict when I can. Idiots will be wrong, and there's no correcting them, so why bother?
68. Are you a listener or a talker?
More of a listener than a talker, I think. When I start to talk, I tend to lecture.
69. How long does it usually take for you to trust others?
I give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Trust everyone, confide in no one. I alter my opinions when it becomes necessary.
70. Do you hold grudges?
Oh, yes. I will say without reservation that, as an enemy, I am not to be taken lightly.
However, grudges become somewhat unnecessary when the loathed object eventually just ups and dies.
71. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
It depends on the situation. Usually, I am content to fade into the background. I am neither a leader nor a follower.
72. Do you like interacting with large groups of people?
Heavens, no. I like being alone. Two or three people are fine, but large groups make me nervous.
73. How well do you express yourself?
Reasonably well, I think. I get my point across, anyway.
74. How quickly do you judge others?
Almost immediately. But then, my first impressions are usually right, so I see no reason to be ashamed of that.
75. Do you care what others think of you?
Not really. Few people can stand me, and even fewer like me. Making any effort to change that would likely end in their deaths, which seems counterproductive.
76. Do you have any enemies? How or why are they your enemy?
I do. I made some unwise decisions when I was younger.
77. What is your favorite pastime? Color? Food? Possession?
Reading or listening to music.
I'm not partial.
Now there's a pointless question.
My mother's wedding ring.
78. What are your preferences in arts and/or entertainment?
Classics. By which I mean roughly anything produced before 1945. I think the telly is going to be the downfall of civilisation.
79. Do you smoke, drink, go whoring, or use drugs? Why or why not?
Yes. It helps... lots of things.
No. I'm a cruel drunk, cruel to others and to myself. It is a pointless exercise.
No. It's complicated.
Yes. Like smoking, it helps.
80. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
Sometimes I go to the pub just to watch the people.
81. What is your most cherished fantasy?
82. How long is your attention span?
As long as it needs to be for the job to get done.
83. Do you laugh a lot? What do you find funny?
Not really. Enough, I suppose. And I have a very stereotypically English sense of humour. More irony than jokes.
84. Is there anything that shocks or offends you? If so, what?
Not much shocks me. Modern fashion offends me. What sort of moron goes wandering around with his skivvies hanging out the top of his trousers? Or, for that matter, why are all teenage girls dressing like streetwalkers now?
85. How do you deal with stress?
Bach, usually. Wagner, every now and then. Heroin, if it's quite bad.
86. How much athletic ability do you have? Artistic?
I used to be quite a good bowler, though it's been ages since I played any cricket. Obviously, I'm quite fast, also.
I have reasonable artistic ability, though only as a musician. I tried my hand at oil painting, once. The whole bloody house smelt of turpentine for weeks afterward.
87. Do you like animals? Do you like children?
I dislike animals, and they dislike me. I've had numerous cats decide to hook themselves firmly to my flesh. Children are uncomfortable. They stare quite a lot, and then they cry, and I feel as though I've broken them.
88. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
I always do have a plan, though sometimes it's a plan concocted in a fraction of a second.
89. Do you have a pet? If so, what is his/her name? Species? Fur color? Etc…
I keep plants. I don't name them.
90. What is your greatest strength as a person? Weakness?
I'm assuming that we're discussing character, here? Perhaps tenacity is my strength. Listing my faults would take all day. Most people I meet waste no time in informing me that I am a self-absorbed ass, too bitter and harsh to stomach. The up side is that they usually leave me alone after that.
91. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I would very much like to be alive.
92. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
Ha! More painfully introverted than most people would care to know.
93. Do you like yourself?
No. But for that matter, nobody else does, either.
94. Do you have a daily routine? How do you feel if your day is interrupted?
I do. It's comforting to have a nice, mundane routine. It doesn't throw me off terribly if I have to take things out of order, though.
95. What goal do you most want to accomplish in the next six months? Your lifetime?
I am in the process of familiarising myself with this Internet thing. I'm beginning to feel that particular pursuit will take up six months, at least. My lifetime is a very long time. It remains to be seen what I can accomplish.
96. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 20 years?
I have no idea. Exactly where I am now, I would wager.
97. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
It doesn't really matter. Obviously, drowning is out. As is pneumonia. And food poisoning. Eventually, something is going to impale or decapitate me, and I don't really care how or what.
98. What is the one thing you would like to be remembered for after your death?
I would like it to be remembered that I tried.
99. What three words would you use to best describe your personality?
I would hesitate to try, but perhaps... "He once loved."
100. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
I haven't the faintest idea. "What a bastard" are the three I hear most frequently. "Bastard," of course, is interchangeable with any number of more colourful options.
101. Why are you risking your life to adventure?
Oh, am I? That's news.